Artificial Intelligence (AI) is everywhere. Whether you view it as a helpful tool or an existential threat, it’s already endlessly embedded in our everyday lives, often in ways we hardly even think about anymore. Face recognition software is on our phones, we have digital assistants, smart home devices, navigation systems, meal planners, and online shopping experiences. It tells us what movies and streaming shows we’ll like, detects credit card fraud, and personalizes our social media feeds.
It’s even finding its way into our human relationships, including the romantic and marital kind. AI-powered algorithms analyze our dating profiles and suggest potential love matches. AI chatbots like Replika are designed to provide emotional support and a sense of connection. At least one couple has recently been married by an AI officiant.
According to a recent survey by Statista Consumer Insights, only 22% of American respondents reported liking to use AI software in their daily lives. Yet the role it plays in our lives and relationships continues to expand.
According to a recent survey by Statista Consumer Insights, only 22% of American respondents reported liking to use AI software in their daily lives. Yet the role it plays in our lives and relationships continues to expand.
According to Forbes, “In an era where technology is increasingly intertwined with every aspect of our lives, Artificial Intelligence (AI) has begun to fill roles that were traditionally reserved for humans, including those of friends, confidants, and even romantic partners. This burgeoning relationship between humans and AI raises profound questions about the nature of companionship, the human need for connection, and the potential consequences of substituting human interaction with digital entities.”
What happens when AI enters spaces as personal, raw, and deeply human as a marriage or romantic relationship? Is it ever a positive presence, a helpful third party, a “real” companion or partner? Can it support and build up a union, improve communication, deepen intimacy—or is it an intruder that undermines closeness, erodes trust?
So much about human-AI interaction feels like sci-fi; the technology is still new and rapidly evolving; there are certainly more questions than answers at this time—but, as Lord Byron wrote, “truth is stranger than fiction.”
Here are three examples of how AI is already impacting modern love and marriage, for better or for worse.
“Grounds” for Divorce
Earlier this month, Vice reported that a Greek woman, married to her husband for 12 years, quickly filed for divorce after an AI chatbot said he might be cheating.
But that’s not the strangest part.
AI tasseography (divining or fortune-telling through the reading of tea leaves, wine sediment, etc.) is trending, so the woman made her husband and herself some Greek coffee. After drinking it, “she took photos of the grounds left in the cups and asked ChatGPT to interpret them….The chatbot reportedly ‘saw’ signs of infidelity—specifically, that her husband was fantasizing about a woman whose name started with an ‘E’ and that this woman was trying to destroy their family.”
The wife took ChatGPT’s word for it and kicked him out.
While cheating spouses often do leave a trail of clues (digital or otherwise), it’s unlikely that trusting the interpretation of a “psychic” chatbot is a sound reason to end a marriage. (The husband’s lawyer has argued as much.)
“AI isn’t sentient,” says Vice. “It doesn’t understand coffee. It can’t see guilt in a stain. But it can reflect back whatever fear, suspicion, or fantasy you bring to it. Sometimes that’s all it takes.”
Seeking: Real Connection with Artificial Partner
Spike Jonze’s thought-provoking 2013 movie, “Her,” starred Joaquin Phoenix as Theo, a lonely, heartsick greeting card writer who turns to an “OS,” an AI companion, voiced by Scarlett Johansson, for connection, companionship, love, and even sex (sort of). Interestingly, the film, which seemed both wildly futuristic and eerily current, was set in 2025. So here we are.
Data show that searches for “AI companion” have increased by 106% since last year, reaching over 130,000 per month. (Searches for AI girlfriend far outnumber searches for AI boyfriend). According to Mashable, a survey of 2,000 Gen Z respondents conducted by Joi AI this spring found that 83 percent believed they could form a deep emotional bond with an AI companion. In contrast, “eight in 10 said they’d consider marrying an AI partner.” Let that sink in. (It’s also worth noting that Common Sense Media has said that AI companions are unsafe for anyone under 18.)
Part of the human condition is that we sometimes feel lonely, unseen and unheard, misunderstood, our emotions unvalidated, even within our relationships. Friendships, romantic partnerships, and marriages are complex, messy, and sometimes frustrating or unsatisfying because the other person has their own feelings, needs, and preoccupations. They’re not just there to serve and fulfill our own.
In an opinion piece for Forbes, writer Chris Westfall points out that AI companions, unencumbered by human emotions and personal distractions, can “listen” with apparently full focus, and respond from a trove of almost unlimited (but fallible) resources at their proverbial fingertips, adapted, no less, to our highly personalized data. “These systems can simulate deep understanding,” offering us a sense of being heard and understood, says Westfall.
Shifali Singh, a Clinical neuropsychologist and director of digital cognitive research at McLean Hospital/Harvard Medical School, explained to Mashable, “When you engage with AI, AI mirrors your own language and your own thought processes, and it feels like real emotional responses.”
The flip side, the danger, is that getting used to such frictionless, non-vulnerable, finely-tuned digital interaction may undermine our ability or drive to engage in real human connection by underscoring its inherent “imperfections,” ultimately making us feel more alone and isolated.
There is already evidence that AI companionship is driving a wedge in some marriages. When your own personal “her” (or him) creates a distraction, dominates your attention, seems to understand, affirm, and fulfill you better than your human spouse, does that attachment to a virtual entity become a kind of cheating, an emotional affair, digital infidelity?
This is just the tip of the iceberg in terms of AI-human “relationship” questions we’re beginning to confront.
Can AI tools ever be helpful in marriage?
One journalist-husband claims ChatGPT has saved his marriage. Josh Elledge writes that, when experiencing conflict with his wife, he has used AI to “break down barriers in communication.” ChatCPT can help “resolve arguments, rebuild trust, and bring empathy back into tough conversations,” Elledge says. “By acting as a neutral, judgment-free assistant, AI can help break the cycle of miscommunication and emotional overwhelm. It provides a space to express your thoughts, organizes them into clear language, and suggests ways to move forward.”
It’s important to remember, though, that AI makes mistakes, and there is always the potential for it to offer unfounded or even harmful advice.
The skilled and caring attorneys at SFLG are committed to building real client relationships built on trust, integrity, and open communication. We offer comprehensive, person-to-person legal support and advice based on over 35 years of experience in family law.
By Debra Schoenberg
