It’s college application season, and many parents of high schoolers are having a lot of feelings right now—mixed feelings:
There’s immense pride in their almost-grown children—everything they’ve accomplished in school, sports, arts, and other activities; landing that first job; the deep friendships they’ve formed, the fine young adults their kids are growing into. There’s excitement for the future in front of them, at college and beyond.
At the same time, they choke up at the very thought of their babies leaving home and thinking about what an empty nest will be like.
And then there’s the knot in their stomachs as they wonder how on earth they will afford this next phase.
Here are some tough financial truths:
In a little over half a century, the average cost of college tuition has tripled. Of course, in addition to the skyrocketing sticker price of tuition and fees, housing costs, meal plans, textbooks, school supplies, and other expenses can add up to thousands of dollars each year.
A recent College Ave survey of parents with current college students found that “While most parents (89%) agree that a college degree is important for their child’s future, less than half (44%) felt ready to pay for the first tuition bill when their child graduated from high school.”
For divorced families, there can be even more layers of complication. Divorce itself is expensive, and over the long haul, co-parents face added financial strain in numerous areas—maintaining separate households, children needing two sets of everything, travel expenses, support payments, the ways being a primary caregiver can impact a parent’s ability to work, and more.
And then there’s the question—involving many factors—of how to pay for college and whose responsibility it is.
What California Co-Parents Need to Know about College Payments
In about half the states in the U.S., the court has the authority to order divorced parents, including a non-custodial parent, to cover (at least some portion of) college expenses.
However, California has no provision for college expenses in child support. Except under unusual circumstances, court-ordered child support ends when your kid turns 18 and graduates from high school. California law does not require parents to pay for educational expenses after the child turns 18 unless the child is still a full-time high school student (in that case, child support ends when the child turns 19 or graduates, whichever comes first)—OR if the parents have made an official arrangement regarding higher education. No specific law or statute dictates who must pay for tuition and other college-related expenses or how parents should share the costs.
So, if you are considering or in the process of divorce and have children—of any age—it is very important to deal up front with the question of who will pay for college. A knowledgeable and strategic family attorney can help you plan for and negotiate college payment arrangements as part of your settlement to avoid confusion, conflict, and panic later on. If you’ve made arrangements regarding college expenses in your divorce agreement, that plan goes into effect when your child enters college, and it is legally binding.
Five steps divorcing parents can take today to plan for their child’s educational future
Remember—it’s about your kid. In the heat of divorce, it can be very difficult to agree on anything—especially an issue that may seem far in the future. But as you look ahead, do your best to work together in the interest of your child’s well-being, education, and success. These decisions will impact them for a long time.
Communicate openly. Talk about your hopes, dreams, values, and goals for your child (and their own if they’re old enough) and how you can support them. Be open, honest, and realistic as you discuss your financial situation as co-parents. Decide whether paying for college is a reasonable obligation to take on—is this a commitment you can afford? (Most financial experts advise against parents taking on heavy debt to pay for college.)
Establish college arrangements in your marriage settlement agreement. You can voluntarily create a structure for covering college expenses in full or in part, deciding how they will be shared and laying out any special conditions. Things to consider: Will you split costs proportionate to income, or 50/50, or simply as able? Will you contribute to all college-related expenses or only tuition? Is there a set amount or a limit on what you will pay? For example, will you divide the cost of ANY college or contribute to the cost of a state university? Does the student have to meet specific criteria or responsibilities, such as maintaining a certain GPA or holding a job to cover a portion? Make sure the details are spelled out and documented. Remember that arrangements made in your settlement become a court order and are enforceable.
Set up a college fund. Consider creating a trust or escrow account to save and protect funds until your child starts college, or designate a joint asset specifically to go toward college expenses.
Get expert help. In addition to an experienced family attorney, a financial adviser can help you plan strategically for your child’s college years, including understanding tax implications and so forth.
The family law experts at SFLG can help smooth your path as co-parents and help you plan for your child’s future.
By Debra Schoenberg
