Whether you’ve been married for a few years or a few decades, entertaining the thought of divorce isn’t easy, especially if you’re unsure if you should even begin the process. Perhaps you have been considering the possibility of divorce for a while, but you’re not sure if that is the right choice. No matter what the situation is, if you’ve noticed the following signs in your marriage, it might be the time to discuss them with your spouse and explore the notion of filing for divorce.
Marriages are complicated with many ups and downs. According to the American Psychological Association, about 40 to 50 percent of married couples end up divorced. Although deciding to start the process is difficult, there are warning signs to watch out for. One of the first signs that may lead to a divorce is if there is a lack of communication and no conflict resolution within the marriage. According to researchers, a marriage’s demise is caused by a lack of successful dispute resolution rather than a lack of contact. Couples who haven’t figured out how to settle conflicts without harming their relationship end up avoiding confrontation. Few couples like to admit it, but conflict is common in all marriages and although most couples who experience conflict will be able to find a resolution, other couples may not be sure where to begin. If a couple doesn’t have the skills to resolve the disagreements, the lack of communication can lead to a divorce.
According to a Woman’s Day report, another major sign that signals divorce is near is if there’s no compromising between you and your spouse in terms of wants and needs. One of the most important aspects of marriage is attempting to meet your partner’s needs while also ensuring that your own are met. You’re not in a good position if your partner consistently refuses to listen to what you need in terms of time, attention, intimacy, and childcare, and/or refuses to express their own needs. Couples need to be able to share experiences they’re excited about, and if your spouse shows no interest in reaching a compromise with you, it may signal that there is trouble in paradise.
Infidelity can destroy a marriage, and if you suspect your spouse is being unfaithful, there is a good chance it’s a sign that the marriage may be over. While some people may be able to move past the cheating for their own sake or because there are children involved, others aren’t quite as able to forgive and forget. For many people, cheating may completely destroy the trust between them and their spouse, and they may feel hurt and betrayed. Unfortunately, many couples find it hard to move on and forgive the cheating, and it might be a sign that the time has come for the marriage to end. While not impossible, studies show that only a small percentage of marriages can recover from infidelity.
While many signs may signal that divorce may be the next step, one of the more serious ones is the presence of domestic violence in a marriage. Allegations of domestic violence are very serious, and they can affect the victim not only physically but also mentally and emotionally. In addition to it being a civil matter, California also imposes criminal liability on persons who have perpetrated domestic violence and who have violated an abuse prevention order. All forms of domestic violence can eventually lead to divorce. Although the immediate effects of the domestic violence may end at that point, the lingering consequences can play an important role in the divorce process.
Divorce is a difficult decision to make, but in some cases, it may be the best option. If you’ve tried to make your marriage work by talking to each other and seeking marriage counseling and things still don’t seem to be getting better, it might be time to call a divorce attorney for help. At Schoenberg Family Law Group, P.C. in San Francisco, our divorce lawyers offer the skill and knowledge to handle even the most complex and contentious divorces, with the object of securing fair resolutions. If you’re seeking legal advice from an experienced divorce attorney, contact our office today to schedule a consultation.
Written by Debra Schoenberg
